My wife and I have recently returned to the UK after nine years living in Turkey. Our Turkish residence was situated in an idyllic spot, close to the coast where the Aegean and Mediterranean seas meet. The environment and scenery are stunning - crystal clear waters, golden sands, forest-clad mountains, an abundance of wild life and if that’s not enough to tempt you there, the region is blessed with wall-to-wall sunshine from May through to October.
Before moving to Turkey, we lived in another tourist hotspot, near the UK’s North Devon coast. This is also a beautiful region and although not benefitting from a Turkish climate, it does have a wealth of attractions for both visitors and residents.
We have now moved to London. A strange choice you might think after two pieces of paradise. To comprehend our decision, it is worth trying to understand what ‘paradise’ actually means. Here’s one definition that I came across:
“A place or condition of great happiness where everything is exactly as you would like it to be.”
This definition cites two alternative states - “PLACE or CONDITION” - for which “everything is exactly as you would like it to be.” For each of the two ‘paradises’ that I have referred to - the Turkish Aegean/ Mediterranean and the UK’s North Devon - it is difficult for most people not to be enthralled by the location (place). Each has a unique beauty that when combined with a comfortable residence, could be described as a piece of paradise.
Now let’s consider the other state of paradise - the condition. Although the place clearly has an influence on the condition, it is not the only driving force. In fact, in my opinion, it makes a small contribution to the happiness equation. It is only one part of “……..where everything is exactly as you would like it to be.” Perhaps I could explain why neither North Devon nor Turkey met that demanding criterion.
In the case of North Devon, it was its insularity. Geographically it is not the easiest place to access in the UK. with no motorway links nor high speed rail access. There is also a culture endemic amongst many of the inhabitants of not wanting to venture, or accept others from, outside the region. During my time there, I was the boss of an engineering company that, in my view, was not as productive as it could have been because of its insular culture. I doubt insularity is unique to North Devon, indeed it is probably found in many rural regions in the UK and around the world where a culture of ‘if you ain’t born and bred here, you’re an outsider’ prevails.
So what about Turkey? Well I love Turkey and my life is much richer for having lived there, but the problem with Turkey is quite simply, ME! In particular, my difficulty was my inability to communicate. I had one-on-one Turkish lessons for over a year, which were excellent and certainly enabled me to get by. So I could do the shopping, pay my taxes, fix the car - those day-to-day chores were not a problem. But to have a really rich conversation, or even write a blog post like this, in Turkish was, for me, nigh on impossible. The possible solutions to this drawback and assuming a high proficiency of the language is unlikely to be achieved, are to spend most of one’s time with English-speaking expat communities, which doesn’t appeal to me or my wife, or find Turks who speak English fluently - not as many as one might think. When faced with those ‘restrictions’ it is easy to feel deaf and dumb.
So there we have it, two pieces of paradise that offer a lot but not enough to hold me back from seeking pastures new. Have I now found paradise? Of course not! I don’t think it exists, which means I will never find it and therefore I can’t lose it. So for me, paradise is never lost!
